totally a bummer

it's slighly annoying to me that people aren't as nuts here as they are at my old store. it leaves me with a surprising lack of blogger fodder. hmph. i mean yea ok, i get a lot of crazy white trash methfaces, but theyre just sad. oh well.

fuck it im going to the beach before work. viva summer.

crossblogging

soemtimes i think i should be cross-blogging (is that even a word?) with www.whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com because there are some terrible terrible terrible instances of people who should NOT breed that shop at my store.

i honestly wish that i could take pictures of some of these people. i mean, it is a cross section of america that makes my eyes pop out of my head.

so last night...

i witnessed a drunk AND pregnant woman buying supplies for her 2 year old son's birthday party with food stamps.

its obviously not the food stamp part that bothers me. : /

oh, and when there is a barrier blocking the one entrance near closing time, do NOT go around it to try to get out of it. its there for a reason, idiots. (the reason being? THE DOOR IS LOCKED).

it kind of freaks me out being the closing cashier at this store, because the front end person leaves a half hour before the store closes. and its just me, a bagger (who generally is special needs), and a mgr who just kinda stay in their office. i feel like this is how horror movies start and i'm totally not into it. yikes.

and to think...i ALMOST thought this would be different

ok. so. i'm almost done with my second week being gainfully (or maybe NOT so gainfully, as i am getting very few hours) employed at a different store in a different part of the country. now, i usually get scheduled at customer service. no. they've been scheduling me as a casheir. which really hurts, because it's SO boring. i can't even. so, i've noticed that almost everyone is a lot nicer than in my old region. and that's great. no one's called me stupid, but others have kinda given me the cold shoulder.

really, the demographic of the citizens of this area is kinda crazy. its like 1/2 white trash methfaces, half yuppies with crazy tans and shorts with whales embroidered on them. and if i have to do one more fucking wic check i'm gonna slap someone.

regardless, the thing that made me most feel like i was at home happened tuesday night. i've been extrordinarily friendly to people and what not, but when this woman asked me "can i talk to your manager?" in such a way that made me think that i did something wrong, i started like shakinnnnng. i guess im so used to crazies blaming me for everything. anyway, so i got my front end mgr and the girl was like "hi how can i help you?" and she's like "i want to complain about the cigarette butts outside" and i was like "phew. well. its not me."

so the mgr came up, talked to the broad, and i guess like...apologized, cause she left. i then later heard my front end mgr telling another girl "yeah she walked past me and was like "COUGH COUGH COUGH ::DIRTY LOOK::" i was kind of like...really? like...is it really that big of a deal? omg there are cig butts outside ALERT THE AUTHORITIES!!! idk, i am clearly all about the environment. but cig butts are realllllly easy to clean up. there is no reason that a customer should have been bitchin about it. idk, but wtf.

oh well.

home for the weekend, USA USA USA! <3

a few general thoguhs here

first of all. the glove lady has not been seen by my own eyes since swine flu came out. i thinkkk she's barricaded in her apartment and never coming out. which is sort of a bummer, because she really is hilarious.

second of all. i'm transferring stores to a store in another state since i'm moving for grad school tomorrow.

i hope there are enough crazies there that i can continue this blog. omg.

the music in my store

ok. so. stores all over the country have terrible music. that kind of goes without saying. our store's radio channel isn't the worst i have heard ( cause at least they don't play that awfulll elevator music) but it is by no means GOOD. every now and then, i notice a good song playing. some highlights include:

• strange condition by pete yorn
• africa by toto
• assorted classic rock songs
• counting blue cars by dishwalla (shut up. such a good song)
• the middle by jimmy eat world
  

there are also a TON of hilariously nostalgic songs that play on our store radio, such as:

• wannabe by spice girls
• mmmbop by hanson
• breakfast at tiffany's by deep blue something

and then there are just the terrible terrible terrible adult contemporary songs that i hear adnauseum. like...its really bad when i start singing along with these songs. there are also songs that i just hate. a lot of them, i have no idea what they are. like there is this song that i could only describe if i made an audio file of me singing but it is SO bad and i hate it so much.

how hard would it be to make a store radio station that like, is slightly hip but not aids for the ears? i mean i know all that crappyass market research about the certain "beats per minute" in songs that makes people buy more, but COME ON!

sorry.

a few open letters...

dear bread lady,

how many effin times are you going to return the same fucking loaf of bread? how many times do you expect us to believe that your boyfriend bought you the wrong kind? do you get off on this shit, you stupid bitch?

love, m.

dear liars,

why must you lie to me and tell me that the lines are crazy out there? do you think i cannot see the front end? nothing infuriates me more, you assholes.

love, m.

dear glovie,

are you dead? i miss your shenegans, even though you annoy the living shit out of me.

love, m.

and the piece de resistance...

dear misogynistic asshole from the other day,

don't call me stupid because i am a woman. taht's a real fine example you're setting for you eight year old daughter. you're a really good dude. i'm sure. seriously choke on it, you dick. i hope your wife leaves you cause you are a pig.

love, m.